Whether it's the weather or just some kind of temporary blast from the past, I've been immersing myself in Tori Amos for the past few days. It's comforting rather than frightening like it used to be. Either way, something's turning. The bible study I'm working on right now is scaring me because I feel strongly that God is preparing my heart for something big. And, though I'm not certain, I have a strong inclination of what it may be. It's not necessarily all that close to me in space or time right now, though it could pop up next week and I wouldn't be surprised.
It's funny because I used to be so terrified of change and it took the biggest change of my life to snuff out that fear. Now that I feel something coming I feel (almost) completely able to embrace it. Does that scare me? It might. It's not human nature to embrace change and I've always fought it with every bit of strength I could muster. Now here it comes and I find myself going out to meet it for the first time ever. It's empowering and enlightening; I know it won't be like this every time I'm challenged with change.
For now I'm content to watch it roll in gradually, knowing that when it's upon me I'll not be caught by surprise.